Rrrrrrrraging Dandyism Reigns in River City...

By now you've seen all the pictures you care to (if you care to) of the North American Handmade Bicycle Show 2008. I took several on Friday, but soon lost interest. Seeing the cameras some folks had was eye opening, and their pictures are much higher quality than any of mine. So go here, here, here and here if you want.
But there is some "insider" reporting to be done, and here's the deal:
You see that fellow above? Imagine him wearing a combination of 2-3 of the following....a waxed moustache, a knee high pair of argyle socks, a knee high pair of gaily striped socks, pink barrettes, 2 more sweaters each smaller than that one, a fedora, a bowler, a roostered out mullet with tendrils snaking down his neck, and mandatory ramrod straight posture.
Yes, he is a rather tame specimen of the Portland scenesters...WTF? Who knew? I had no inkling that this steampunk/thrift/sensitivebikepoet culture existed. They all want to be this guy, or maybe this guy from 3:10 to Yuma (great flick):
I was this guy:
with a big chunk of this guy:


and this was a view I saw a lot of:
while doing my best to make sure everyone else had this vision as well.

Attending with Hunter Cycles and Black Cat Bicycles was a guaranteed Real Good Time. The intent to distribute beer at Black Cat was thwarted by the show security, so we had to keep the drinking under wraps by using official show cups...this worked so well, that we kept doing it. Over and over. If y'all came by the booth, I hope we were attentive. Everyone was intending to be helpful, with more or less success- depending. A large contingent from Santa Cruz bikes were in effect, so there was lots of internicene squabbling and some pushing, slapping, and grabassery. The dropouts -go see Black Cat- were a huge hit, as they should be. Frames were sold, interest piqued.

Hunter had some truly useful and well thought out cargo bikes, along with a sexy, curvy 29er swamper with a bitchin, pinstriped (Watsonville, holmes!) lowrider paint scheme and integrated arced bar-stem combo. And, they had some really useful and stylish caps custom from Rainy Peak Cyclery, (go see them and heckle until they respond , it's worth it for the unbelievable knickers)- some truly Quality People.


I'd be remiss if I didn't point out what everyone from Portland was crowing about- that it has more strip clubs per capita than even Vegas. This is true. And a good thing, too.

We even made it to the Diablo, a "vegan" strip club. The speculation about the real meaning of this went everywhere you think it did. My first happy thoughts were of anemic girls with granny glasses, and hairy armpits wearing old fashioned pasties and wool shorts...
Of course, the reality fell far short of this. In point of fact, the girl I interviewed was not certain why it was a vegan club, and"thought" they had good food but was neither a vegetarian nor a very talented stripper. The talent pool was far deeper at Union Jacks or Sassy's. I like the Sexy Librarian.

Everyone affiliated with me had bikes, and that was best. Weather turned out awesome, and I only used the selftent for one ride. After the show we rode everywhere, and everywhere we rode there were other people on bikes. Lots of them. Lots. Derbies broke out, booze was broke out, bikes were piled, seeds and stems were piled...a fire was lit. It was very different in that regard (well, the hordes of riders, anyway) from the San Jose shows or Interbike. So, raging dandies and all, Portland kicked ass and it's a bummer that Indianapolis is the next stop. Sorry, Indiana, but what was Don Walker thinking? Boo. Hiss.

Here are some photos I stole from the sites cited above. Starting with the Sycip keg pull shifters... not so practical, but fun.


The hunter Cycles (Pajaro, the no frills version of Hunter bikes) model Hillbilly Roadster..

A top contender for me( I lik a big headube) was this ssx from Retrotec's Curtis Inglis
I accosted Curtis in (where else?) the men's room to tell him I wanted to talk about not getting into SSWC2008- he groaned, apparently this happens a lot. I laughed and told him I was coming anyway and poaching his race. He's a good guy with a good sense of humor. He said I should. And I will. And You should too.


I really liked this
from Villin Cycles. The part you can't see here so well is the super nice small touch of twined "lugs" of copper wire. Neat bike.

These guys are bike kooks in the best way, and this bike represents, generally, the rando/townie vibe of the show...

Here're some detail shots of the Naked bike that won a) people's choice b) best in show, and c) President Walker's Choice... check out the wood inlaid Aheadset
marvel at the custom wood grips..
wonder about the wisdom of this (admittedly well executed) lock hole...

because you know you'd never leave this bike locked somewheres, and you'd lose your wood rimmed wheels [yes, they were not only present but prevalent. I hate the very idea. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Bad in the dry(warp, shrink), bad in the wet (warp, swell). Yeah, yeah, yeah...show bike this and that....stooopid. There was even a seminar on them? I missed that one in favor of drinking beer and talking shit.] Anyway, I looked at this bike at least 5 times, and saw a detail I'd missed before at each new viewing. Really, an amazing bike. Supposedly Lance Armstrong bought it. No, I did not see him, but he was there.


And, in spite of the "What would Sascha Do" buttons that were popping up on well dressed showgoers all over, my personal favorite...
It's his daughter's bike, with 24" (?) wheels. Loudass was heard to remark "Bet that kid goes to private school" while passing... what would Sascha do? He'd have a 4 (!) year (!) wait list! Sorry, y'all are suckers. Holy Crap, it's nice, but:
Yep. That's MY daughter on her green stylee townie. A thrift store fillet brazed Schwinn, bitches.

Still and all..