it's gonna be a long weekend...

Hey baby, que paso? You won't be hearing from me for a while. I'm going to Portland, suckas. Why? You ask, and well you might. Cuzza the North American Man-Bike Love Association, that's why. Or maybe it's the NAHBS.

I'll be drinking surreptitiously in the aisles and taking blurry photos to post later on this very site. Sure, there'll be a bunch of "PRO" bloggers there with good cameras and "wireless" internet (if such a thing really exists), but will they capture the essence of what y'all want to see?

Let me ask you this- will they be able to succinctly determine the fundamental essence of each individual builder through the judicious placement of empty cans of inexpensive beer on or about said builder's displays? Non, mon frere. To illustrate: at last year's San Jose show, a can (scientifically emptied for the purposes of this experiment) of Natural Ice was placed in the bottle cage of one of Bruce Gordon's fantastically constructed road frames, and an exact replica of this can was placed in a Vanilla rando frame's cage. In a revealing display of soulful nonchalance with regard to the commingling of expensive custom frames and cheap beer-drinking jackassery, the Hon. Mr. Gordon 's can remained in place for the duration. The Vanilla? Removed within 4 minutes of its placement, even though it was positioned within 18" of a 1/2 full bottle of whiskey- which, disappointingly, was only part of the display. Not to mention that the Soulcraft empty can ended up taped to the hand of their display womanneqin! Very telling results...

These are the type of fine toothed observations you can expect upon my return.So, come and visit again while I'm gone. Look back and reflect. Check out the sidebar, it's free. Poke around and look at some pearls you may have missed when they were 1st cast... a savage poke in the eye to the reader who can name the gent in the tux at the very bottom of this page.


Konichiwa, bitches. Get out and ride...