apparent disregard of taste and fine art

Dude came into the shop the other day with a 1976 Masi Gran Criterium to be boxed for shipping. I don't really dig them, but I know of some guys who do so I packaged it up real nice. Lots and lots of foam wrap and tape and cardboard and zip-ties and newspaper. I'd a taken some pictures, but...you know. The guy sort of gave me the creeps, to be honest. I packaged it well out of love for bicycles and anonymous peoples on the internet, not him. He was in his 60s and spoke with an English accent that may have been put on, and his wardrobe was age-inappropriate. Was it you?

Other guy calls the shop yesterday, and was nonplussed when informed that his 39t middle chainring has not arrived. "But you told me it would be there today." I had no hand in this prior to answering the phone, but I'm a team player and I'd like us all to have our bikes and ride them too, so I explained that, perhaps, the extended weekend played a part in the delay. "I don't even know what to say to you people." Which I particularly like, because I get to be part of a persecuted minority and that is rare for me. I speculated that the part will be arriving in short order- quite possibly in the following day or 2- as I am certain it has been both ordered and shipped. I checked the computer while he was grumbling at me. I assured him we would get right to work on it when the part arrived and call him upon completion. "I guess I just can't trust anything you people [really. again! I love it.] say." I told him I will try and keep a tighter control over the mail for him and hung up. He was such a dick and I was done swallowing. We will see if I face repercussions over this, because our owner is almost maniacal with regard to customer ass kissing.

I showed up this morning to a text from the mechanic who worked on the bike originally, saying he's forgotten to tell the customer he'd installed a new BB ($55 surprise!) because the old one was crapped out. This had not been cleared or discussed. I texted back the above exchange and the other mechanic tells me that dude hung up on him when he was told he'd need a new chainring and it would require ordering. Winner, winner. This whole scenario was effed, because at that point the guy had a legitimate (we should have called and gotten clearance before installing parts- it's common sense, common courtesy,  and even policy) bone of contention he can really worry, and he seems just the type to do so.

And so I set to work on this fine, middle of the road, 7 year old carbon fiber, triple chainring, adjustable stem pointed down and housing not trimmed accordingly, broken alloy chainring bolt, busted free seat tube water bottle bolt insert...bike only to find it hasn't been ridden (or taken care of) in months, and yet dude acts like he's got some rush to ride. As though we were blowing his tight regimen all to hell. I cleaned, carbon pasted, installed, trimmed, replaced, glued, lubed and tuned the hell out of that bike for the love of bikes.

And for the love of a small paycheck. And for industry pricing. If he hadn't been such an ass, I'd have even re-wrapped his bars for him as part of the tune, but he was and I left those unsightly gaps.

We have a separate form on which we document all the details of a tune-up. It's a useful checklist that helps prevent forgetful mistakes and allows for an in depth explanation if the mechanic who'd done the tune is absent, etc. I documented all the little details, and when the guy came to pick up the bike I quoted him the final price, with no mention of details. Then I paused for the explosion. That's my style. I will try to brazen it out if possible. Ask forgiveness not permission, you know. Dude didn't blink an eye, so neither did I.

Fuck it, I'm going bike camping!

outside of the Law your luck will run out fast

Just finished Tyler Hamilton's (with Daniel Coyle) book, The Secret Race. Hell no I didn't pay money for it- library, fool! It is worth a read if your interests lie in that direction. If you're not already completely overloaded on the fiasco that was PRO road racing in the late '90s and 2000s. I'd have a beer with Floyd Landis. The UCI has really got to go. Lance Armstrong truly is a butthole. Etc.

Who is rallying for this weekend's Full Moon Bicycle Freakout? It promises to be a real fine time...

one or two passable extravagancies

You are in the grip of an obsession. How do you want to handle that? There are some ways it can not be a disaster. Chief among them? Riding that bike, the one that has all the parts on it right now and is in working order.

In this corner, I got back in the saddle on the cross/street bike (again, on account of how the rear wheel which is in the process of breaking has not fully broken...so it is not imperative that I fix it right this minute). Walked out the door and rode a blend of street and dirt to that one sweeping right hander into which a bushy and annoying oak limb has been intruding. For a couple years this branch has been pushing. Used to be, you would have to duck down to handlebar level and lean out over the washy, off-cambered downhill to avoid it and I was tired of that. Enough to finally remember and bring a tool to fix the situation. I used the small pull saw. Were you to ride that trail today, you wouldn't even notice work had been done and that is the sad mark of the PRO trail maintenance. It is slightly melancholy because there is nothing to show for all that effort. There is the improved ride, though.

Ripping downhill, with short bursts of steep climbing. Knee brace did some work.

I popped out onto some more street. I had stashed the saw in the woods so it was lots of unencumbered road climbing to those false summits, one after the other. I was not able to find the singletracks we have been speculating are over there. I was able to roll right offa that perfectly smooth and pitched asphalt downhill and onto the bumpy and steep dirt road which led in turn to the triceps hammering combination of trails down again. Street to home. That street/cross bike is such a fun ride. It's hardly a compromise anywhere! So fast. So thrilling.

I do enjoy riding from my door. I recognize that I am fortunate in living close enough to the trails that I can have that option, but I also figure it's a choice I make. We got lots of folks in the shop asking about "bicycle racks", and I start asking what they want to carry- only to find they are asking about "car racks for bicycles". That's a let down. I say, "if you have the opportunity, you should ride from your door", but what I mean is "you're probably blowing it." Sniff, if you must- but are you sniffing because you are lazy and uninspired or because you really do live more than a half hour's ride from the Goods? And I'm not talking about road trips, I'm talking about your local.


P.S. A gal came into the shop today and clued me in to a dirt road offa that other steeeeep climb that goes a place we want to go, with connections to other places. It falls to __ to hunt down those of the possible connections that are not only rideable, but enjoyable...because some of this terrain around here is too steep and rough to be fun.

now even blander and more conflict-free!

Words. You may have noticed the content around here listing heavily toward the obfuscatory. What can I say? What can I say? What can I say?

Some of the rides that we do or plan are not for public consumption. I'd rather be under the radar than under the thumb. But, I am strangely compelled to scribble about these bicycle jaunts and so there are the blank spaces, the redactions, here. Just know that if it's unclear it was so much _____er than you imagine.

In this vein, __d_ and I rode the cyclocross bikes t'other day. I haven't been riding my super custom Black Cat cyclocross bicycle because I've got issues with the rear wheel. The drive-side spokes are pulling through the shitty Salsa Delgado box sucktion rims, and I've been too lazy and there are too many other accessible bikes to ride to do anything about it. This day, I'd decided to do something about it...say "fuck it, the spokes aren't going to fail catastrophically" and ride it anyway. It worked out great.

We started with a plan, but it changed on account of the above was just coming off the couch and illness (and still put the screws to me?! Dang.). Since the original plan had involved a bunch of road and then a bunch of singletrack and then a bunch more road, I'd (cleverly) decided to make my compromise on the trail section, it being nominally shorter, and have everything available to me on the (longer) road section(s). With the change in plan this was no longer the genius selection it had been. At the end of a day spent riding I had a big smile on my face.

At several stages during that day though, I had a big pucker going. At one point I was bound to the slidey, sandy, off-camber-to-the-outside Earth solely by a combination of willpower and ass-clenching. It was exciting! I will allow that the dirt was perfect. Perfect. Tacky, firmly set-up goodness. It was rarely the slick 37mm tyres holding me back as we climbed and climbed and descended and climbed, swooping the while. A new trail in Santa Cruz? Yes, and it is good up and down.

Whatever mushrooms the forests up there hold, they are safe from me. The singletrack will not be denied. It is February, if you are unsure, and we were laying down the Radness all day. Sometimes this California ish is OK.



Halfway stop:

...just up the street from the Bigfoot Museum. I have yet to have less than a Good Time there. We have shown up in all kinds of states and frequently in full body-hugging lycra and never even had the hint of a bad attitude. Classy as it gets.



The knee brace worked out pretty well. It is adjustable in several ways, and is open at the back to allow for easy flexion with minimum binding. It did catch on my frame pump (you damn right, frame pump), and of course it chafed and bound a little. However, there were 2 distinct instances when I felt it save me from some gapping at the joint- so, worth using for certain. Just like the slick tyres, everything is a trade-off somewheres. There might be a lesson in that.

the perfect occasion

 achtung! SON (Schmidt's Original Nabendynamo) is now producing a dynohub with a 15mm thru-axle...I think you know what this means. I see it is available through Peter White Cycles*(scroll down a bit), and looks to retail in the $ohmygoodness range, but it is what it is. I'm excited and you should be too, if you like to go adventuring off road on your bike where it is rough and you're smart. Or soft I guess. I am those things in spades.

There have been several "incidents" involving demo bikes and the use of a guy's personal normal dynohub, and they aren't optimal. The 15mm thru-axle makes a big difference in stiffness. I say all this while resting on my laurels of notorious discontent with the marketing of bike related items solely based on the "new" and "improved" monikers (does anyone still recommend bike stuff based on how Xtreme it is?). For real, this is exciting stuff. I'm shtill vaiting for ze huge groundswell of support needed to convince zose Germans zat a 135mm spaced dynohub is worth making...fat bike riders rise up and take your stance!

*your local can get these parts from Peter White Cycles and sell them to you for retail pricing, if you prefer. Because you aren't the kind of casual asshole who walks into the local shop expecting and demanding discounted everything.

my ___ is playing tricks on me

“With a bit of luck, his life was ruined forever. Always thinking that just behind some narrow door in all of his favorite bars, men in red woolen shirts are getting incredible kicks from things he’ll never know.” 

Hunter S. Thompson,  "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" 

 My knee is troubling me. Seem like I turned a certain corner on the trail of Life and now I have issues. MCL is a bitch, but it could be worse. Supposedly injuries to this ligament respond well without surgery, and this is a level 1 (self diagnosis is my doc) at most. It really feels like a pre-injury. There is a clicking sensation and a small but sharp pain with some motion, like when I catch my foot walking and it tugs my lower leg out. I seem to be doing this a lot lately, though I figure you probably don't notice the times when there is no instability to light up. Anyhow, I have begun icing and will look into getting a brace tomorrow- which is key, because we are thinking of lighting it up on a biggish cross bike ride (remember those?) Tuesday...

I hope this finds you well, or at least good looking.

the exact same thing

Words to the effect that there was the rolling and the leaning and the grinning cannot adequately convey the asskicking goodness of the getting off work early, the ritual suiting up, and the dirt riding. Pictures are unavailable, as I have broken my camera and my phone's ability to be a camera. Prolly because the overall joy of dirt riding is too much to be contained by either.

I demoed the full carbone full squish from the shop, and dang! it is a rocket. I love to hate mass produced throwaway bikes, and will not be purchasing one, but it is some fun. Throw your weight into the inside of a turn and feel the bike come around beneath you like you were the pivot around which the whole damn planet revolves. Do it again.

The only way to really pick up what I'm putting down is to try it for yourself. This is me telling you to go ride your bike. This is the Truth within you recognizing the Truth through a computer screen, darkly. GO!