cause the posers always poseI suppose they will bite
they'll try not to show it
I came very plain and then feelin' rather loaded...(del tha funky homo sapien)
So those of y'all who've heard this one before can just put your heads down on your desks for the remainder of the period. For whatever reason, I woke up thinking about this. About 4 years ago (!) now I was riding my fixed gear bicycle and I misjudged a bike-path situation. It leaves me conflicted to this day.
So, I'd been riding my fixxie on a poach, and was wearing my knickers, and I felt very, uh, hella pumped up? It was on the bike path through town on my way to the next section of poached dirt that I saw 2 guys playing what I thought was foot down. Derby, if you will. And I don't know about you, but I will... I swear the one guy stopped short in front of the fella on the (apparently) drop-bar fixed-gear wearing desert camo knickers and a messenger bag. And they're laughing and passing each other close, so I'm coming up quick and I figure "It's on".
I passed the short stopper and grabbed the camo guy's bag (to be fair, I grabbed him fairly hard) and tugged him rearwards to kill his momentum as I went by. Then I soft pedalled to let them catch up and make the next move. Which turned out to be the camo guy catching up and yelling "You forget something?", to which I replied "I forgot the beer! Y"all got that covered?" He then says "You coulda killed me!" And that's the point at which I realized I"d misjudged things. I reassessed - empty, spotless bag; fancy sunglasses; diamond (looking?) earring; snug artsy t-shirt; calculated stubble; coaster brake?!?!?
Oh. This was my first intimation that fixed was a scene. I'd seen Fixed Gear Gallery, and was largely stoked to see folks enthused about fixxies. But there was no scene around it here, and this was a surprise to me. The whole faux messenger thing. Surprise!
Now, I'm a jackass for certain, but not (generally speaking) an as_hole. When it became clear to me these guys had no idea what I was doing, I apologized and tried to explain what I'd thought was happening. Problem was, I explained further by saying I'd thought the one guy (who was behind us and calming down) had stopped short "Like this." And I gave a little stop/skid (Jackass, remember?) to illustrate. Which reangered the one guy behind me. Attempts to smooth this over failed.Fixed as a Trend seems to be on the downswing to me, though I do not possess the clue. Some pundits are laying out cargo bikes as the next big thing. I (clearly) do not have the clue. We'll all continue riding the bikes we lik, I guess.
10 comments:
i'm chuckling. that "scene" has made it's way east my friend. faux fixie hipsters have landed. save your women and children!
had a similar encounter last year. walking the dogs, see a guy running with flat tired fix, talk a bit and decide to meet up for a ride. total fixed gear gallery tool; cheap ass conversion scenster in a no scene town. riding like an ass blowing lights and stop signs cause it looks good on youtube. never road with him again even though he bragged how good his buddy can ride to sweeten the deal.
maybe i'm hard to impress. think i spotted them yesterday with the flats only wrapped on track drops for street cred and sex appeal.
i should the commutity a service and lead them to the hills for spun out fixie death descents and smile as 2 less asses piss of the drivers i deal with daily.
Madison was deep with those kind of clowns, but I think Del and his Style Police are winning the war...
God bless coaster brakes.
I'm so out of it, I wouldn't know what to pose as.
mmmmmmnope. G- coaster brakes have their place, and it's on a cruiser. Ok, maybe a "scraper bike". Not on a road frame that has been repurposed to LOOK like a fixxie for the sake of appearance, and that's what was happening there. If one is making the best of what is available in order to keep riding, Right On.
The whole post is beating a dead horse, I know. I still feel jilted with regard to the fake derby more than anything. If someone rolled up and bumped me, I'd figure it was time to play. Is that reasonable?
In PG or Reading or a lot of places its just not reasonable...like it or not. With the popularization of any movement you can't expect everyone will understand/view as "fully" or even in the same way you do....trends have a way of evolving as they move through society.
The fadification of anything has its pluses and minuses. When you dig something you want more people to dig it....but a large proporton of people are inherently douche-bags so the more people who dig what you dig the higher the probability that you will run into one or more people who look like they are cool to interact with (because they dig what you dig) but in reality are douche-bags. Got that? I should use that example in my stats class.
I've been through this with music, food, bikes and whatever. I'm not saying I was O.G. on anything...but its always tough to balance the upside of the popularization (easier, better and cheaper access to music, ingredients, parts whatever) with the reality of dealing with trendy, condescending, douche-bags. Of course its easier to blow them off when the are douche-bags down with some something trendy that isn't your gig.
Was I put off when some 18 year at Rutgers explained to me that it was impossible to ride a fixed gear bike without dropout pulls (ya man...you would pull you wheel in a second without them)..sure...do I think roller races with your fork fixed to a stand are stupid...yes..do I think I "know" better then anyone...not really...I just think all teenagers (include my self when I was 13 to 18) and at least half of the adults out their are idiots.
Dont worry....this whole fixed thing will pass soon enough
LJ- "....a large proporton of people are inherently douche-bags" makes me laugh.
You are correct in the things you say. Hats off.
BUT.If I see you doing anything remotely derbyish, I'll not be able to help it...
Brother Dick,
Confession time. I haven'y ridden a bike with coaster brakes in...let's see...ahhh, 55 years?
But...I'm Willin'.
G- in that case, you, sir, are an agent provocateur. The lemon-lime eye assault dragonfly makes so much sense, now.
The insect was my idea. The colors and lugs were the creator's interruptation of the new owner's desires. I doubt it will wear well, rather like painting a living room orange.
-Agent Provocateur
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